Bloodfeast!: The Adventures of Sgt. Lunch Blu-ray Movie

Rating summary

Movie		2.5
Video		2.5
Audio		3.0
Extras		4.5
Overall		4.0

Bloodfeast!: The Adventures of Sgt. Lunch Blu-ray Movie Review

Reviewed by Brian Orndorf November 2, 2023

1991’s “Bloodfeast! The Adventures of Sgt. Lunch” is a goof. It was made as a distraction while director David Palamaro and his friends were involved with the military, using their base as a studio of sorts, giving them room to explore what’s intended to be a supercop cinema parody, attempting to go silly with a shot-on-video endeavor. There’s certainly the central idea of a heroic law enforcement officer on the hunt for crime, dealing with despicable villains and a killing machine. The humor of it all is up for debate, as Palamaro basically uses “Sgt. Lunch” (which doesn’t even have an IMDB entry) as his film school, learning about the ways of timing and execution as he screws around with his buddies and their plastic guns. They’re clearly having a ball making the picture, but it’s not quite as fun to sit through it.

Sgt. Lunch (Steve Station) is a top cop on the force, known for jumping into action and helping those in need. He remains a humble man, but always ready to make a difference in the community. Trouble emerges from the shadows when Lunch’s younger brother, Feast (Station), prepares for war, creating a killing machine in the Annihilator, with the Terminator-like brute setting out to kill anyone who stands in the way of his ultimate target, pursuing Lunch with absolute determination. Lunch is distracted, spending time with Mary (Kim Payton), a reporter who’s attracted to the cop, and he’s not ready to take on the Annihilator, requiring training from Chuck Van Lee (Jose Rodriguez), a martial arts master willing to turn Lunch into a man capable of protecting himself and others as Feast unleashes chaos around town, desperate to destroy his brother and claim victory.

We know Lunch is a strange man in the opening seconds of the film, as the cop visits a hot dog stand located on a pier, spreading cheese and grape jelly on his beachside snack. It’s an effective way to understand the character’s quirks and tolerance levels, but Lunch is soon snapped back to reality when a purse snatcher grabs a bag near him. It’s the first of a few chases in “Sgt. Lunch,” with Palamaro trying to keep things exciting to the best of his ability, with the bad guy leading Lunch through physical challenges, including jumps, gun play, and bicycle action. The eventual capture of the creep marks Lunch’s 300th arrest as a police officer, making him a media darling and the top dog of the force, offered cookies for his heroism, while Mary is quick to gift herself to the seemingly virginal man. “Sgt. Lunch” sets up the character as a person of goodness and concentration, ready to defeat any criminal that comes his way.

Unfortunately for Lunch, Feast has big plans for his sibling’s death, manufacturing a machine that’s powered by two slap bracelets and clad in black leather, giving Palamaro a chance to live out his James Cameron fantasies by launching his own Terminator. The Annihilator is returned to repeatedly during “Sgt. Lunch,” massacring those daring to get in its way, and a major sequence in the picture details the cyborg’s visit to the apartment of a Spanish couple, with the husband hoping to bring down the aggressor on his own. The bruiser also manages to slaughter three guys on a basketball court, which plays into the comedic aspects of the endeavor. As for Lunch, his journey involves time with Van Lee (finding the master inside the “Phuk U Chinese Pub”), a man of action who provides Palamaro with an opportunity to stage a training montage as the cop works to build up his strength for the final fight.

Bloodfeast!: The Adventures of Sgt. Lunch Blu-ray Movie, Video Quality 

"Bloodfeast! The Adventures of Sgt. Lunch" comes with an introductory note explaining that the film was transferred from old SVHS tapes, "the only remaining original source material in existence." Age is present throughout the viewing experience, and the source is in rough shape at times, with plenty of damage and distortion. Clarity isn't the goal, but some sense of frame information is retained, offering a soft view of the action. Colors also lack freshness, but the basics are appreciable, just not remarkable.

Bloodfeast!: The Adventures of Sgt. Lunch Blu-ray Movie, Audio Quality 

The 2.0 DTS-HD MA also deals with age, offering only a basic sense of dialogue exchanges, which do battle with sound limitations and damage. Intelligibility isn't completely lost, but it's a close call at times. Scoring supports with a slightly louder synth presence. Sound effects are blunt, ranging in intensity as action deals with punches and guns.

Bloodfeast!: The Adventures of Sgt. Lunch Blu-ray Movie, Special Features and Extras 

• Commentary features director David Palamaro.

• "One Pizza, One Donut" (13:18, HD) is a video conference interview with director David Palamaro and actor Steve Station. The helmer opens with the reveal that his early movies primarily used people from a military base he was involved with, giving him access to willing actors and crew. The origin story of "Sgt. Lunch" is shared, first formed in 1991's "The Toxic Kid," with Palamaro out to make his own version of "The Naked Gun" and other parody films. Station discusses his characterization, basically acting like himself for the duration of his performance. The creative motivation of the endeavor is analyzed, and special shots are highlighted, including a twin effect with Station that fooled some viewers. "Sgt. Lunch" was an educational experience for the interviewees, with Palamaro learning more about editing and pacing during the shoot.

• "A Tribute to Dean Galanis" (3:23, HD) returns to director Dave Palamaro, who offers some kind words for a fellow SOV filmmaker and VHS enthusiast.

• Deleted Scenes (8:43, SD) are offered.

• "The Toxic Kid" (35:56, SD) is a "Sgt. Lunch" prequel from 1991.

• "Milton's Laundry" (38:26, SD) is a 1993 short film from director David Palamaro.

• Outtakes (7:19, SD) are taken from "Milton's Laundry," focusing on flubbed lines and laughing fits.

• "David Palamaro Short Films" (SD) offer 1989's "Hockeyman" (2:28), 1990's "Cookies & Lobster, Please" (3:50), 1993's "COPS in Allentown" (17:48), 1993's "Losing My Religion" (4:15), 1994's "Leave That Thing Alone" (4:38), and 1999's "The Black Wolf Project" (3:52).

• A Trailer has not been included on this release.

Bloodfeast!: The Adventures of Sgt. Lunch Blu-ray Movie, Overall Score and Recommendation 

"Sgt. Lunch" goes for laughs, but not in a forceful manner. It's meant to be goofy, but Palamaro doesn't have a handle on silliness, mostly fumbling jokes. He's also dealing with the inherent limitations of the production, shooting around dorm rooms and on the grounds of the military base, which brings a slightly oppressive mood to a movie that hopes to provide a good time. The helmer is more alert with action opportunities, and while the effort isn't really going for hardcore stunts, there's mild craziness to hold attention, including a climatic chase where Lunch hops on a skateboard to attack Annihilator in his car, semi-executing an evasive maneuver copied from "Back to the Future." It's not much, but it's exciting, and "Bloodfeast! The Adventures of Sgt. Lunch" could use a lot more craziness to help wake up the film, which has the general idea to provide a wild ride of jesting and fights, but it only rarely works up the energy to actually do anything memorable.