Rating summary

Movie		1.5
Video		4.5
Audio		4.5
Extras		1.5
Overall		2.5

What to Expect When You're Expecting Blu-ray Movie Review

Stillborn.

Reviewed by Jeffrey Kauffman September 15, 2012

There’s a well known adage that states “babies (and/or children) don’t come with instruction manuals,” but that hasn’t stopped the publishing industry from trying to fill that void. Any parent worth his or her salt will be able to tell you of countless books that have attempted to elucidate the “right” way to do everything from affixing a diaper to navigating the torrid waters of teenage sexuality. And the “instruction manuals” don’t just start with childbirth. One of the most popular books of the past several decades that has attempted to school prospective parents in the joys (and, well, terrors) of having kids was called What To Expect When You’re Expecting, a field guide for the prenatal months. The book first appeared in 1984 and has sold millions and millions of copies through several editions in the interim, and if you were a parent during this multi-decade timeframe, chances are you either had the book yourself or knew someone who did. (In a nice piece of synchronicity which points up just how long this book has been around, at the very moment this review was being written a news report was released online stating that the book's author, Heidi Murkoff, had just announced that her "baby" who had inspired the writing of the book had just announced she was pregnant, making Murkoff an expectant grandmother.) Of course, no amount of schooling can properly prepare you for the immense responsibility of raising a child, and all sorts of un expected obstacles can pop up with alarming frequency. It’s material rife for mining, and of course incipient parenthood has been part and parcel of film comedies virtually since celluloid was invented, so the task of inventing something new in this genre is understandably daunting. Props, then, of a certain order to What to Expect When You’re Expecting, film version, for not even trying; this is a film that resolutely basks in its own mediocrity and refuses to aim for anything other than occasional laughs and some typically cloying sentimentality. What to Expect When You’re Expecting is, in a word, expected.

This is yet another ensemble “comedy” with a paucity of actual laughs, but a surfeit of outlandish occupations. Cameron Diaz portrays Jules, a celebrity fitness trainer (think Jillian Michaels) who, as the film opens, wins a reality show obviously modeled on Dancing With the Stars and then promptly vomits into the trophy cup in just one of many so-called “jokes” that are telegraphed from a mile (or more) off. When the MC smarmily quips, “Let’s hope she’s not pregnant,” we know of course she is, but more importantly, we may be asking the MC, “Why? Why should we hope she’s not pregnant?” It’s just the first in a long series of disconnects this film offers.

Moving on in the unlikely career sweepstakes, however, we also have Wendy (Elizabeth Banks), a kind of uptight suburban wannabe mom who runs a baby shop and has just written a book glorifying the joys of breast feeding. Her obviously whipped hubby, Gary (Ben Falcone), politely gives a veritable “yes, dear” when Wendy’s smartphone announces she’s ovulating and she needs a quickie in the shop’s back room to increase the chances of actually getting pregnant. Adding to Gary’s woes is the fact that his slimy father, Ramsey (Dennis Quaid), a famous NASCAR driver (of course), has married a trophy wife and has promptly gotten her pregnant with twins.

But, wait you also get: Holly (Jennifer Lopez), a celebrated photographer who has decided to adopt an Ehtiopian child despite the obvious reservations of her husband Alex (Rodrigo Santoro). In a passing nod to blue collar workers everywhere, we also have two impossibly glamorous food truck operators, Marco (Chace Crawford) and Rosie (Anna Kendrick), whose unplanned assignation leads to something equally unplanned. Also playing into the round robin of instantly forgettable stories is a new dads’ support group where some of the raunchier humor is introduced courtesy of Chris Rock, who plays Vic, the founder of the group.

What to Expect When You’re Expecting wants to create a lot of noise and distraction to cover up the fact that it is a series of not very funny one liners in search of an actual story. The film has some undeniably funny moments, but there’s nothing here that creates a bond between the audience and the characters. The actors are all game, and some of the supporting turns are actually funnier than any of the leads, but it’s just a paper thin enterprise that is obviously trying to cash in on a famous book’s title without offering anything other than that title.

Still, every cloud has a silver lining, and in this case there’s an unexpected piece of good news, however snarky some may feel I’m being by pointing it out. What to Expect When You’re Expecting is an ensemble “comedy” with melodramatic elements that is generic in about every sense of the word, but which attempts to inject a little local “flavor” by being set in Atlanta. If that sounds familiar to those of you who keep up with mass marketed entertainments masquerading as film events (not to mention Lionsgate releases), it’s for a good reason. And the good news here is that What to Expect When You’re Expecting is not a Tyler Perry film.

What to Expect When You're Expecting Blu-ray Movie, Video Quality 

What to Expect When You're Expecting is presented on Blu-ray courtesy of Lionsgate Films with an AVC encoded 1080p transfer in 2.40:1. Lionsgate regularly cranks out stellar transfers of both excellent and some frankly less than excellent films, and What to Expect When You're Expecting is no exception. This is a remarkably sharp and well defined high definition presentation, one that is able to easily traverse everything from sun dappled brightness to some relatively dimly lit interior locations with consistently solid contrast and incredibly pleasing fine object detail. Colors are very nicely saturated and very robust throughout this enterprise. There are some very minor stability issues on a couple of establishing shots of Atlanta, but otherwise this is another sterling effort from Lionsgate. If only the film itself were this good.

What to Expect When You're Expecting Blu-ray Movie, Audio Quality 

What to Expect When You're Expecting features a lossless DTS-HD Master Audio 7.1 mix which might strike some as a bit of surround overkill when immersion here isn't of paramount importance. Things actually get off to a great start, with the dance routine that Diaz does as part of her quasi-Dancing With the Stars appearance. The salsa music and crowd sounds ably fill the surround channels and there are some excellent uses of discrete channelization, as when one boisterous audience member shouts out an approving yell before the results are announced. Surround activity is also well utilized in several large crowd scenes scattered throughout the film, as well as its copious use of source cues, all of which sound great. Dialogue is cleanly presented and always easy to hear. Fidelity is very strong and dynamic range is surprisingly wide for this kind of film.

What to Expect When You're Expecting Blu-ray Movie, Special Features and Extras 

• The Dudes Unscrewed (HD; 12:11) focuses on the mens' group headed by Chris Rock, as well as more generally on how men deal with pregnancy. There are actually a couple of laughs in the confessionals here that are funnier than anything in the film.


• What to Expect and the Pregnancy Bible (HD; 15:25) is an homage to the book that inspired the movie. Director Kirk Jones comments that 97% of literate women who become pregnant buy the book as their primary guide. Cameron Diaz's comparison of the book's longevity to Sherlock Holmes and Great Expectations perhaps says more about her contemporary (and still relatively young) point of view than it does about the book's actual impact.


• Deleted Scenes (HD; 5:03) play out with timecode captions.


• Theatrical Trailer (HD; 2:08)

What to Expect When You're Expecting Blu-ray Movie, Overall Score and Recommendation 

What to Expect When You're Expecting delivers (sorry for the horrible pun) pretty much exactly what it promises, which is a round robin of interlocking stories with pregnancy at the core. Yes, there are laughs, and yes, there are a couple of heartstring tugging moments, but it's all so completely predictable and uninspired that it actually becomes difficult to even concentrate on the film after a while, let alone care about any of its (many) characters. The cast is game, and some of the supporting performances outshine the headlining stars, but it's pretty much all for naught. There's some passing talk in the film about Couvade Syndrome, the phenomenon when an expectant father starts experiencing the same physical (and emotional) issues his pregnant significant other or wife is going through. I'm going to be charitable and chalk my incipient nausea over this film up to that.