Rating summary

Movie		1.5
Video		4.0
Audio		3.5
Extras		0.0
Overall		1.5

Waiting for Forever Blu-ray Movie Review

The title is a hint as to how you’ll feel waiting for the film to end.

Reviewed by Casey Broadwater June 22, 2011

I don’t particularly enjoy ragging on terrible rom-coms, not even the biggest, most bloated, mawkish and self-satisfied ones. It seems like a waste of everyone’s time. Critics almost categorically dismiss films like Waiting for Forever as soppy, substanceless drivel, but one glance at the user reviews on sites like imdb.com reveal legions of fans who write about this movie and others in gushing all-caps proclamations. (“…an ACTUAL, REAL LIFE, love story…”) They also commonly level the complaint against critics that “only the most jaded viewer could fail to be charmed by this movie.” Of course, film writers come off as arrogant or elitist if they ever mention the flipside—that only the most indiscriminate viewer could be charmed by a film so wet with artificial sentiment. I’m not trying to drum up sympathy here, I’m just pointing out the obvious: reviews of these kinds of movies are often superfluous. If you like all rom-coms, even the dippiest ones, stop reading here; Waiting for Forever most assuredly has the capacity to jerk tears and pluck heartstrings. You won’t like the rest of what I have to say. On the contrary, if you’re unconditionally opposed to sappy melodrama, you probably wouldn’t want to read a review of a film called Waiting for Forever anyway. You already know what to expect. If, however, you’re still with me and you’re genuinely curious about what makes this movie so unconscionably awful, read on.

I’ll try to keep this brief, but honestly, I’m not sure where to start. The phrase “everything that’s wrong with the romantic comedy genre” leaps immediately to mind. Even the title, Waiting for Forever, seems culled from a prospective list of names for the blandest, most non-descript rom-com imaginable. The best way I can describe the experience of watching the film is that it’s like being forced to politely but wearily flip through the pages of a too-cute Martha Stewart scrapbook—one that retells a bastardized and degraded version of Benny & Joon—as its creator hovers anxiously over your shoulder, making sure you take in all the artless details of every cursive-handwriting-festooned page. Meanwhile, in an adjacent room, a sad-sack with an acoustic guitar plays sensitive boy music for an audience of no one. Sounds like fun, right?

The movie oozes gooey artificiality from its very first frames, as a stylized, flickering montage shows a young boy and girl frolicking together happily in the snow and on a playground, intercut with shots of—wait for it—the boy’s parents dying in a freak train derailment. Over top of this, the grown- up version of the boy, Will (Tom Sturridge), mumbles about how “if you ask me, you start out with goodness so pure and clear you don’t even know it’s there.” Will, described in promo materials for the film as a “quirky street performer with a free spirit and a heart of pure gold,” has never lost that sense of childhood innocence. As we meet him hitchhiking down a desert highway, he’s wearing clashing pajamas, a black vest, and a bowler hat. How quirky and free-spirited!

When a kindly older couple stops to pick him up, he sits in the back seat and doles out his entire life story. (Read: exposition.) Ever since he was a kid, he’s been in love with his best friend, Emma, but they were separated when his parents were killed. Emma, played by former O.C. actress Rachel Bilson, is a failed actress whose TV show has just been canceled—see what they did there?—and she’s traveling back to their home town to be with her mom (Blythe Danner) and terminally ill, dying-of-cancer dad (Richard Jenkins). Will heard about this from a friend and has decided to follow her home and finally profess his undying affections. But, see, this isn’t the first time he’s followed across the country. No, he’s something of a good-natured stalker, and in the past he’s trailed her from Portland to San Francisco to L.A., always remaining just outside her social periphery. He just wants to be near her, or, as he describes it, “being around where she might be.”

Obviously, this is deeply weird and disturbing, but the film wants us to think it’s totally endearing, just another one of Will’s kooky eccentricities. Will’s brother (Scott Mechlowitz)—a responsible, take-no-chances banker—tries to bring his kid bro back to reality, basically telling him that the world isn’t all flowers and puppy dogs and happy thoughts, but this doesn’t stop our pajama-wearing protagonist from camping outside Emma’s house, waiting to catch a glimpse of her. His plan is to take her around to all their childhood haunts—the playground! the soda shoppe! the treehouse!—and reveal, after 16 years of not once having spoken to her, that he loves her madly. Did I mention that Will talks, out loud, to his dead parents, who have essentially become his imaginary friends? The guy’s got some serious mental issues, but—and here’s where the film goes off the deep end —the message of the movie seems to be that his extreme naiveté, innocence, and loony sense of hopefulness is a good thing. Love conquers all, after all! And then there’s the subplot where he’s wrongfully accused of murdering one of Emma’s former lovers, but I’m not even going to get into that here.

The film’s accepting attitude towards Will’s unhinged behavior is ridiculous, but screenwriter Steve Adams and director James Keach—yes, the guy who played Jesse James in The Long Riders—have no idea what to do with any of the other character either. Emma has naught to do but be the unsuspecting object of Will’s desire, and Will’s brother is a one-dimensional square, somehow the bad guy even though he’s the most sensible person in the movie. Worse, though, is the maudlin way the film treats Emma’s father’s illness. Yes, this is yet another story where cancer is invoked solely for the purpose of being emotionally manipulative. The film’s low point—and that’s saying something—is when Blythe Danner starts blubbering and Richard Jenkins screams at her, “Do you have any idea how unattractive that look on your face is right now?” But wait! He’s not an ass—he’s just trying to teach her “to be strong when I’m gone.” She bursts into even more tears at this, and he pulls her close: “Do you have any idea how beautiful the expression on your face is right now?” That’s Waiting for Forever in a nutshell—shallow, mawkish, unbelievably awful. If my eyes could roll any further, they’d get lodged backwards in my skull.

Waiting for Forever Blu-ray Movie, Video Quality 

After blowing my ire on the film itself, I really have nothing bad at all to say about Waiting for Forever's 1080p/AVC-encoded transfer, which is colorful, clear, and natural, with no abuses of noise reduction, edge enhancement, or other PQ follies. The image exhibits a strong degree of clarity throughout—see the stubble on Richard Jenkins' face, the threading of Blythe Danner's sweaters, or even the fine felt texture of Tom Sturridge's bowler —and although the cinematography is often lifeless, the picture manages to conjure a good illusion of depth. Color is cheesily stylized during the hammy flashback scenes, with glowing highlights and selective saturation/desaturation, but for most of the film the look is fairly natural, showing dense-but- realistic hues and balanced skin tones. Black levels are deep too, and contrast is tight without ever becoming overblown. Noise/grain is kept to a minimum—I couldn't find any info on whether the movie was shot digitally or on film—and there are no outstanding compression-related problems to report.

Waiting for Forever Blu-ray Movie, Audio Quality 

Waiting for Forever's DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1 surround track delivers exactly the kind of experience you expect from this kind of film—quiet, dialogue-driven, and with a backdrop of soppy, emo-all-grown-up guitar balladry. The mix isn't exceptional in any way, but it is perfectly adequate, clear and grounded, with no obvious audio slip-ups like muffling, crackling, or tinny highs. The rear channels are put to use bleeding out the soporific score, and you'll also hear some occasional ambience, like pouring rain, outdoorsy sounds—birds and wind—or barroom chatter. Dialogue is consistently clear and intelligible. Overall, this is a high-quality, low-impact mix that does what it needs to do without any additional figurative bells and whistles. Optional English SDH and Spanish subtitles are also included in easy-to-read white lettering.

Waiting for Forever Blu-ray Movie, Special Features and Extras 

There's not a single supplement on the disc, not even a theatrical trailer.

Waiting for Forever Blu-ray Movie, Overall Score and Recommendation 

There may be a vocal minority of folks who think Waiting for Forever is "an ACTUAL, REAL LIFE, love story," but for most it'll be a depressing display of fake, undeserved sentiment, not to mention frankly offensive for being yet another romance movie to use cancer as an emotionally manipulative plot point. Also, is it not incredibly unsettling that the stalker—and yes, he is a stalker—gets the girl in the end? (Come on, you know that's no spoiler.) Stay away from this dreck.