Valentine's Day Blu-ray Movie

Rating summary

Movie		2.0
Video		3.5
Audio		3.5
Extras		2.0
Overall		3.0

Valentine's Day Blu-ray Movie Review

A romantic clunker stumbles onto Blu-ray.

Reviewed by Martin Liebman May 13, 2010

Today is Valentine's Day.

Let there be stars, as many as that dot the nighttime sky. OK, maybe not quite that many; how about the Los Angeles nighttime sky, where there's but a couple dozen poking out through the smog, roughly the same number that came out for a spin in Director Garry Marshall's (Pretty Woman) Valentine's Day, a picture that's the polar opposite of Pretty Woman if there ever was one. Same director, a carryover star, but two films so different on so many levels. One, an incredible Romance for the ages. The other, a floundering nothing of a movie that still managed to pull in well over $100,000,000 domestic box office gross, thanks, no doubt, to the Two Taylors -- Swift and Lautner -- who also happen to be lovebirds in the movie and are destined to pick up this year's Razzie for Worst Screen Couple. Valentine's Day lacks all those little intangibles that made Pretty Woman such a memorable success, like characterization, a manageable plot, an excellent pace, an outstanding supporting cast, a picture-perfect rags-to-riches tale, and delightful acting. Valentine's Day is just the opposite, the picture clumsily assembled, haphazardly paced, extraordinarily detached, and horrendously lacking in character development, all built around unfocused direction and far too many name actors vying for top billing and audience attention.

Some students will go to great lengths for a good grade.

In Los Angeles, the lives of nearly two dozen individuals will in some way be altered over the course of a single Valentine's Day, a day on which hearts will be broken, loves will be renewed, cheaters will be exposed, and new romances will blossom. Reed (Ashton Kutcher, Spread), a florist, proposes to his girlfriend Morley (Jessica Alba, Into the Blue), who accepts; Reed shares the news with his good friend, Alphonso (George Lopez, Henry Poole is Here). Reed also becomes privy to information that could redefine the relationship between his friend Julia (Jennifer Garner, Ghosts of Girlfriends Past) and her boyfriend Harrison (Patrick Dempsey, Made of Honor). Sports Reporter Kelvin Moore (Jamie Foxx, Collateral) is given a demeaning assignment to cover Valentine's Day around the city, but his fortunes take a turn for the better when news that star football player Sean Jackson's (Eric Dane, Marley & Me) career is up in the air. That means Jackson will be spending the day working with his publicist, Kara (Jessica Biel, Stealth), and his agent, Paula (Queen Latifah, The Last Holiday). Liz (Anne Hathaway, The Devil Wears Prada) works for Paula. She also moonlights as a phone sex operator, a secret she's trying to hide from her boyfriend, Jason (Topher Grace, Spider-Man 3). Edgar (Hector Elizondo, Necessary Roughness) and wife Estelle (Shirley MacLaine, Being There) are caring for their grandson, Edison (Bryce Robinson). Edison's babysitter, Grace (Emma Roberts, Hotel for Dogs), is hoping to use the occasion of Valentine's Day to lose her virginity to her boyfriend, Alex (Carter Jenkins, Aliens in the Attic). Willy (Taylor Lautner, The Twilight Saga: New Moon) and Felicia (Taylor Swift) are high school students in a superficial relationship. Finally, Kate (Julia Roberts, Mona Lisa Smile) is an Army Captain returning home on leave; on her flight, she meets the kindhearted Holden (Bradley Cooper, The Hangover).

There are a couple good things to say about Valentine's Day. For one, it's actually not all that difficult to keep track of most of the characters. Though it takes him a good 30 minutes to actually get them all on-screen, Director Garry Marshall somehow juggles this entire lot of characters into a semi-manageable clump. He also gets the most out of a few of his actors, particularly Ashton Kutcher who's one of the few bright spots in the film; his performance features an obvious enthusiasm for the part, a naturally honest portrayal of his character, and excellent chemistry with on-screen buddy George Lopez. He's more or less the "main character" if there can be such a thing in Valentine's Day, in part because he seems to have the most screen time (it would be interesting to watch Valentine's Day with a stopwatch and see just how much play each character gets, that is if one can manage to stick it out for a second 120-minute marathon) and in part because his character is actually -- gasp -- developed to an extent that makes him somewhat sympathetic and relatable. That's the real problem here. There's just too much going on and too many characters to worry about, leaving no time to create any semblance of emotional depth within the story or get involved in the nitty-gritty of the characters' various plights, even within the span of two hours. Had half of them been cut from the film -- maybe stick with Kutcher's story, Roberts' story, Elizondo's story, Robinson's (Bryce Robinson, the boy who plays "Edison") story, and maybe one or two others that have some bearing on these tales -- Valentine's Day might have not only proven more manageable, but it would have allowed for the characters to enjoy richer development while also trimming the runtime down to a more genre-friendly 90-100 minutes. Valentine's Day could have easily cut out the "Two Taylors," Eric Dane, Emma Roberts, Carter Jenkins, Queen Latifah, Topher Grace, Anne Hathaway, and Jamie Foxx (though he's good in his part and delivers the movie's funniest line) with no negative effects on the movie.

Indeed, Valentine's Day falters under the sheer lack of characterization. While it's easy to know who's who -- Jamie Foxx is a second-tier sportscaster, Julia Roberts is military officer returning home, Patrick Dempsey is a doctor with a secret, Anne Hathaway is a phone sex operator struggling to make ends meet, Jessica Biel is a public relations specialist -- most every character is presented like a group of strangers wearing "hello, my name is..." tags that give a name, a picture, and an occupation. Rarely offering anything more but fortunately never providing anything less, Valentine's Day's characters are mostly a forgettable mishmash of empty vessels. Even under a deluge of both cheerfully bubbly and would-be gloomy Romantic Comedy/Drama movie cliché, there's hardly ever a point in Valentine's Day where it's easy to celebrate a reunion or grieve for a break-up because it's impossible to care about two characters that find their relationship on the rocks 54 minutes into the movie, particularly when one of the two has had about three minutes of screen time. It's equally difficult to care when a separated couple gets back together when their story consists of "hello, we're in the movie," "oops! I once cheated on you," "I'm out of here," "please forgive me," and "OK." Then there's the really pointless characters that are seemingly superfluous to the story, can't act, or both. Taylor Swift turns in a performance that the good folks over at the Razzie's are going to remember for a long time. Her character is supposed to be a ditz, sure, but she makes Channing Tatum in G.I. Joe look like Marlon Brando, Gary Oldman, Denzel Washington, and Humphrey Bogart all rolled into one. Valentine's Day does have a few surprises up its sleeve at the end of the movie -- the revelation of Julia Roberts' place in the story proves surprising and touching -- but it's hardly enough to make up for 120 minutes of what is otherwise painful banality.

Valentine's Day Blu-ray Movie, Video Quality 

Valentine's Day's 1080p, 1.78:1-framed transfer isn't particularly sweet, but it's far from sour. New Line's transfer is steady but underwhelming, the image flat, dark, and never exhibiting much in the way of high definition "pop." Flesh tones take on a noticeable red push, and there's a reddish/orange aura about much of the film. Colors, similarly, linger on the warm end of the spectrum but lack vibrancy. Blacks never appear too bright, but they do sometimes overwhelm finer details and dominate the screen. The image is flat with detailing that's suitable for a high-def release but that falls well short of many of the upper-echelon transfers; wrinkly clothes and bedsheets, building façades around Los Angeles, and ornate Eastern clothing as seen in the third act look fine, but faces often appear pasty and undefined. A few halos and a touch of blocking linger about a few shots, but the print is free of unwanted debris and is covered by a layer of film grain. Valentine's Day rarely looks great but never does it ever look awful; it's sort of a "shrug the shoulders" type of Blu-ray release that won't wow general audiences and won't downright offend videophiles.

Valentine's Day Blu-ray Movie, Audio Quality 

Valentine's Day comes to Blu-ray with a DTS-HD MA 5.1 lossless soundtrack. Other than some garbled dialogue that occasionally has characters sounding like they're speaking through a tin can -- a scene featuring Sean speaking with his P.R. representative and agent in chapter eight serving as a prime example -- New Line's track is technically proficient in delivering the picture's minimal sound design. There's very little going on here; this is a dialogue-driven film with only a few major sound effects and the occasional song. Music is suitably crisp and full with a palpable surround channel support structure. Atmospherics are minimal; listeners will enjoy the slight background din of several locations or the hum of a jet engine in the Julia Roberts/Bradley Cooper airplane scenes, but there's not much else of note in that area. The track picks up once or twice with some spunkier musical selections; a brief scene featuring 2Pac's California Love opens up the track and gives the subwoofer something to do. Otherwise, Valentine's Day's lossless soundtrack is a by-the-books presentation that's sonically uninteresting but technically proficient in most areas.

Valentine's Day Blu-ray Movie, Special Features and Extras 

Valentine's Day delivers a fair assortment of extras, including a peppy audio commentary track with Director Garry Marshall. As he tries to keep the audience in-line with all the goings-on throughout the movie, Marshall speaks on the talent in the film, his attraction to the project, the process of shooting certain scenes, shooting around Los Angeles, adding a few elements for the men in the audience, and much more. Marshall's track proves much better than the movie; he plays along and gives the whole thing a light tone, giving equal attention to the stars and the process of making the movie. For fans, this one will make for a nice compliment to the movie. Next is The Stars Confess Their Valentine's Day Stories (1080p, 6:27), a short piece that features the cast and crew speaking on what they think of the holiday while recalling their best and worst memories of Valentines past. The Garry Factor (1080p, 5:03) features the cast heaping praise on the director. Also included is the Stary Here Forever music video by Jewel (1080p, 3:10), a blooper reel (1080p, 5:47), 14 deleted scenes with optional Director Introductions (1080p, 22:28), and an exclusive sneak peak at Sex and the City 2 (1080p, 2:49). Disc two contains both a DVD and iTunes-compatible digital copy of Valentine's Day. Sampled on a second-generation iPod Touch, the video proves stable with minimal blocking but retains the somewhat dull color scheme of the film, while the audio -- even for as minimalist as it is -- plays as spacious and clear with strong dialogue reproduction a bit of heft in applicable scenes.

Valentine's Day Blu-ray Movie, Overall Score and Recommendation 

Valentine's Day is a sloth of a film. It's slow, overpopulated and underdeveloped, and lacks any sort of emotional depth, even when the movie tries to draw either sympathy or jubilation from its audience. The characters are too many and their development too little; Director Garry Marshall manages to keep them readily identifiable, but only because audiences don't need to learn more than one major trait for any given character. Though it might have worked better with the number of characters cut in half, Valentine's Day, as it is, is just too much of a hassle for too little of a reward. New Line's Blu-ray release of Valentine's Day proves a capable, if not somewhat middling, effort. Featuring a steady but unremarkable technical presentation and a handful of supplements (and, oddly enough, no Taylor Swift music videos), most genre fans will want to enjoy Valentine's Day as a rental.