Rating summary

Movie		0.5
Video		2.5
Audio		3.5
Extras		0.0
Overall		1.5

The Scorpion King 2: Rise of a Warrior Blu-ray Movie Review

It's The Disney Channel meets the sword-and-sandal genre.

Reviewed by Martin Liebman September 2, 2008

We all deserve to die. The only question is in what manner and how soon.

Here's a helpful hint to filmmakers from a longtime fan of action movies: a 109 minute runtime is far too long for a direct-to-video prequel of a mediocre spinoff movie of a dwindling franchise. The Scorpion King 2: Rise of a Warrior is overlong, slow, and dull, even when taking into account its low budget, straight-to-Blu-ray origins. It still comes as a bit of a shock that the movie is as terrible as it is. Directed by veteran Russell Mulcahy (Highlander), the film features a straightforward adventure plot that hits on all the appropriate clichés, including revenge, an attractive female co-star, a witty sidekick, the search for a powerful weapon, and a series of challenges that the heroes courageously face and barely escape. Generally, such movies are passable, but considering the terrible special effects, a script that's laughably juvenile, and lousy acting from some Disney Channel wannabes and Randy Couture (who turned in an admirable performance in Redbelt, which goes to show what a good script can do), The Scorpion King 2: Rise of a Warrior joins the club of "worst of the worst" available on Blu-ray, along with films such as Meet the Spartans, One Missed Call, Starship Troopers 3: Marauder, and The Hills Have Eyes 2.

Yeah, I'll grow up to be The Rock! You wanna make somethin' of it?

The Scorpion King 2: Rise of a Warrior begins with Matheyus, the character portrayed by Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson in both The Mummy Returns and The Scorpion King. In The Scorpion King 2: Rise of a Warrior, we meet Metheyus (the role handed now to a younger Michael Copon, TV's "Power Rangers Time Force") as a child-in-training to be a "Black Scorpion," the upper-echelon of warriors represented by the best-of-the-best. Mathayus' father, Ashur, does not want his son to participate in the training, and is later killed by Sargon (Couture) for his interference. Infuriated, Matheyus continues his training in hopes of one day being powerful enough to slay Sargon and avenge his father's death. Years pass, and Matheyus has matured to be a fine Black Scorpion warrior who is invited to be Sargon's personal bodyguard. Eager to take the chance to be close to his lifelong nemesis and kill him when the timing is right, Saragon requires Mathayus to kill his own brother as proof of his loyalty. Mathayus, of course, declines, choosing to fight back, but he barely escapes Saragon and his black magic. His brother is killed in the escape, however, reinforcing Matheyus' hatred for and desire to kill Sargon. Teaming up with his lifelong friend, Layla (Karen David), and a Greek named Ari (Simon Quarterman), Mathayus sets out to find the Sword of Damocles, a legendary weapon with the power to slay the mighty Sargon.

The Scorpion King 2: Rise of a Warrior's greatest shortcoming is that it panders to an audience that won't be watching the movie, namely anyone who watches material aimed at preteens and young teenagers. Line after line of dialogue is spoken throughout the film, primarily by the characters Mathayus and Layla, that sounds like it's from a hot-off-the-press script of the latest High School Musical movie or Raven Symone vehicle. It would be interesting to find out which came first: the casting or the final script. With lines of dialogue like, "you know, this may come as a shock to you, but not everything in the world happens because of you," and "everyone should go and see the pyramids once in their lives," the movie, set many centuries ago, may as well have been a time travel movie where the heroes are fresh off the set of a "Saved By the Bell" spinoff in 2008. You may find yourself in stitches after this exchange that almost has to be heard to be believed, because the inflections and delivery are really quite comical in the context of the movie:

Layla: "You're not scared, are you?"
Mathayus: "huh, don't be ridiculous."
Layla: "uuhh."
Mathayus: "You?"
Layla: "Puh-lease!"

It's rather juvenile and completely out of place. Yes, the script calls for a teenaged hero, but when your setting is back in the days when there was no such thing as the Gap, iTunes, Hannah Montana, cell phones, and Seventeen magazine, you don't write your characters like they've all just come out of an evening showing of the latest teen slasher film of 2008. Of course, the review would not be complete without a mention for the wisecracking sidekick, Ari, who may go down as the most stereotypical sidekick of all time. When the trio of heroes falls through a trap door, and Mathayus asks Layla if she is OK, Ari responds with the old "I'm fine too, thank you." Yawn. Three jeers for the old script-o-matic. The bad dialogue overshadows everything else wrong with the movie, but the special effects are so bad that they, too deserve a mention. One only need to chapter skip to the end of the movie and watch the final confrontation that features a CGI scorpion that is partially invisible. The effect is just terrible, and as bad it looked in The Mummy Returns, the difference between that and what we see here is like comparing the Mona Lisa to something your average preschooler might bring home.

The Scorpion King 2: Rise of a Warrior Blu-ray Movie, Video Quality 

The Scorpion King 2: Rise of a Warrior's 1080p, 1.78:1 framed transfer on Blu-ray fails to impress. The best looking aspects of the disc are the studio logo and the film's title card. Detail is moderately good throughout, but there is a dullness to the transfer that never lets it truly shine. Interior shots fail to impress, noted during a sequence when Mathayus goes to Sargon's palace in chapter three. The limited color palette ventures towards the red side of the scale with only moderate black levels, poor shadow detail, a lack of general detail, flat looking objects, and no vibrancy at all. There is a hint of green to flesh tones and other objects, too, that is noticeable in many of the film's darker sequences. The underground battle sequence in chapter seven exhibits all the same characteristics noted above, and it's extremely noisy in the blacks, too. Black levels do look good in some scenes, and the film's brightest outdoor scenes, like that on the ship to Egypt where Mathayus and Layla meet Ari the Greek, look rather nice. There is a good transfer here, yearning to get out, but it's masked by a myriad of annoyances that make it rather bland. As far as it's place among all the high definition transfers on the market, we've seen much better, and this is certainly Universal's worst looking disc to date, though it must be noted that until now, the studio's discs have all highly impressed.

The Scorpion King 2: Rise of a Warrior Blu-ray Movie, Audio Quality 

The Scorpion King 2: Rise of a Warrior features a mildly entertaining and generally active DTS-HD MA 5.1 lossless soundtrack that is the highlight of the disc, which really isn't saying all that much. Dialogue is loud and clear, and effects, especially lows, are nice and natural with a solid rumble from the subwoofer when called upon. The audio presentation is fine, with sound spread across the entirety of the soundstage, although there is sometimes a phony pitch to some of the effects. For example, some applause heard during an early segment of the film sounds like it doesn't quite match the action on-screen; it has that canned sound to it, and it seems to emanate from a few spots it shouldn't, with a disproportionate volume. Such issues are present in several places, where effects seem forced and out of place. Some of the effects do work well, however. The ship scene in chapter five, for example, offers perhaps the most natural sound presentation on the disc, just like it offered the best looking sequence of the film from a visual perspective. The rocking and creaking of the boat and the rolling of the ocean all around it creates a very nice atmosphere that makes us feel like we're on the ship. Too bad the lousy dialogue and acting take away anything positive the soundtrack brings to the scene. Overall, this track is acceptable and plenty active, but it never manages to stand above the crowd, either.

The Scorpion King 2: Rise of a Warrior Blu-ray Movie, Special Features and Extras 

The Scorpion King 2: Rise of a Warrior offers viewers no special features, a first for a Universal Blu-ray.

The Scorpion King 2: Rise of a Warrior Blu-ray Movie, Overall Score and Recommendation 

The Scorpion King 2: Rise of a Warrior has no redeeming qualities. The acting is bad, the dialogue is atrocious and out-of-place, the special effects are horrible, the plot meanders, and the action is dull. Parts of the movie are laugh-out-loud funny, though not intentionally so. Unfortunately, the gap between downright bad and so-bad-it's-funny is far too wide to make a viewing of this film worthwhile. Likewise, this Blu-ray release from Universal is not worth your time. Featuring a rather poor video presentation, an acceptable but somewhat lackluster audio track (not to mention no additional language options), and absolutely nothing in the way of bonus materials, this is one package worth ignoring.