Rating summary

Movie		2.5
Video		2.5
Audio		3.0
Extras		0.0
Overall		2.5

Tales from the Crypt Presents: Ritual Blu-ray Movie Review

Tales from Jamaica.

Reviewed by Martin Liebman December 9, 2012

No good deed goes unpunished.

There was a time when Tales from the Crypt was the big thing on television, or at least it seemed that way to preteens trying to catch a forbidden glimpse into that then-mystical world of adult-oriented premium cable television. A radical program that promised blood and nudity and other, various adult themes and hosted by a frightening crusty demon with scraggly hair and a few crooked black teeth who seemed like an amalgamation of Freddy's wit, Jason's decay, and Chucky's size, the show earned big numbers and featured bigger name guest stars and directors to stretch that appeal even wider. Such popularity would invariably bring about the inevitable expansion into film. 2002's Ritual is the third of three such films, following Demon Knight and Bordello of Blood. Does Ritual capture the same magical success and promote the same sense of allure, intrigue, and forbidden goodness of the television show?

Nope.

Don't expect to see much of me.

It might be sun and fun and scantily-clad beauties for the Cryptkeeper's Jamaica getaway, but Dr. Alice Dodgson's (Jennifer Grey) stay in the land of rum and Caribbean beats could be disaster. Alice is a good person and a knowledgeable physician. Unfortunately, one of her patients dies when she disobeys orders and prescribes to her unauthorized medicine. She's reprimanded for her actions and sentenced to a two-year suspension of practice. She is, however, permitted to answer a "help wanted" ad that takes her to Jamaica where she finds herself caring for a local socialite named Wesley Claybourne (Daniel Lapaine), a sick young man who believes himself to be a zombie. During her stay and course of treatment, Alice befriends Caro Lamb (Kristen Wilson) and begins to suspect that there's much more to the truth behind Wesley's illness. Alice soon finds her life and that of her patient in jeopardy as she becomes submersed in the dangerous world of Jamaican voodoo and dark arts.

There's a semi-interesting history behind Ritual: Tales from the Crypt. Not only was the film set for release about six years after the show had aired its last episode on HBO, it premiered only in overseas theaters; stateside audiences would have to wait four more years to see it only in a direct-to-video release, a full decade after Tales from the Crypt had run its course on television. Even for a character as quasi-iconic as the Cryptkeeper, that's a long stretch for a movie tied to a long-departed television program to wait for a release. What's more, Ritual ties into the series in (forced) name only. It features a slapped-on segment with the Cryptkeeper at the beginning and ditches him altogether thereafter, without so much as even a narrative interlude to recap acts or developments and usher in the next. In fact, many Ritual releases didn't even contain the Cryptkeeper opener until the film surfaced on U.S. video store shelves. Needless to say, it's a film with a bit of a pedigree to which it never quite lives up, and even considered as a standalone movie (which, in truth, is exactly what this is), Ritual fails to elicit much more than the classic cinema shrug that will leave viewers satisfied on the most basic of levels but hardly thrilled or eager to ever see it again.

Indeed, Ritual generally pleases as a forgettable, time-wasting Horror/Mystery film but does almost nothing to differentiate itself beyond place and time of setting. The film creates a suitably creepy atmosphere of voodoo and the unknown even as it relies on -- once or twice too many times, probably -- rather obvious misdirection in the form of character hallucinations and nightmares that portend various acts of violence that turn out only to be figments of overactive or, perhaps, externally influenced imaginations. The peel away from the linearity of real life doesn't leave viewers in a state of confusion so much as a state of tedium; after the first time the picture's forays into those false realities only serve to delay the journey towards the admittedly surprising inevitable, but on the plus side of the ledger they do provide a bit of action and bloodletting that at the very least spices things up in between some fairly lengthy stretches of bland character development and story progressions. The film fails to find much of a purpose beyond generic scares. There's little sense of the urgent, not much rhythm, and juiced up violence in those misdirecting scenes that adequately compliment the nightmarish voodoo vibes but that don't create a real sense of palpable terror. The film is built around a fair premise but populated by rather unimaginative characters to boot. The end does offer up a solid surprise that many probably won't see coming, but it's not really worth the tiresome journey required to get there.

Tales from the Crypt Presents: Ritual Blu-ray Movie, Video Quality 

Ritual: Tales From the Crypt makes its Blu-ray debut with a lackluster high definition transfer that shows moments of goodness but generally leaves viewers wanting quite a bit more than Echo Bridge has to offer. The image does offer a fairly steady grain field that's not particularly overbearing and that does help shape a passably film-like transfer. However, crisp details are rather few and far between. Softness is only a rare occurrence, but the image never ascends into the upper echelons of strong Blu-ray clarity and dazzling textures. The color palette varies wildly throughout, both deliberately within the film's visual parameters and as a result of just a dim, uninspired presentation. Bright hues threaten to pop upon Alice's Jamaica arrival, but most lower-light scenes fail to offer much stability or vibrancy. Light bleeding, overpowering reds, and warm flesh tones are common. Blacks vary quite a bit as well, appearing deep and true in some spots but pale and sometimes lightly purple in others. The print shows excess wear and tear in the way of dirt and scratches and other unwanted print impurities, but it settles down quite a bit after a rough open. Light edge enhancement also appears in various shots. All in all, a barely passable but very much forgettable transfer that could have been much better.

Tales from the Crypt Presents: Ritual Blu-ray Movie, Audio Quality 

Ritual: Tales From the Crypt features a fairly active and fundamentally effective DTS-HD Master Audio 2.0 lossless soundtrack. The track may lack surround elements, but it does manage to create a rather spacious front end sound field. Music and ambience both nicely spread across the front, yielding potent but pleasant volume at reference levels as well as acceptable clarity. Crackling fires, noisy nighttime insects, and other natural sound elements manage to make their way into the stage with enough presence and sonic accuracy to realistically paint various aural pictures throughout the film. A few big action-oriented effects play with a good jolt of energy, and a jam session in chapter seven spruces up the musical elements. Dialogue plays with suitable clarity and evenness. This isn't a memorable listen, but it serves a midlevel movie and a lower-end Blu-ray as well as should reasonably be expected of it.

Tales from the Crypt Presents: Ritual Blu-ray Movie, Special Features and Extras 

Ritual: Tales From the Crypt contains no supplemental content.

Tales from the Crypt Presents: Ritual Blu-ray Movie, Overall Score and Recommendation 

Ritual: Tales From the Crypt isn't anything remotely special, and it isn't even anything all that memorable. It isn't even anything that could be classified as a must-see, for that matter. This is strictly time-killing Horror cinema at its most disposable. The movie is made well enough; it's technically sound, adequately acted, and it's not a total bore, but there are literally hundreds -- if not thousands -- of movies with more all-around value than this. And for those expecting Tales from the Crypt, just replay the first few Cryptkeeper minutes because afterwards this is nothing but a standalone movie. All that said, it's possible to do far, far worse on a lazy sick day. That just speaks to the wild variations in quality in cinema as well as the nearly countless choices available. Echo Bridge's Blu-ray release of Ritual: Tales From the Crypt offers middling video, uninspired audio, and no extras. Rent it when superior options are exhausted.