Rating summary

Movie		3.0
Video		4.5
Audio		3.5
Extras		4.5
Overall		4.5

Splatter University Blu-ray Movie Review

Reviewed by Brian Orndorf January 28, 2019

As slasher cinema rode a wave of popularity in the 1980s, anyone with basic budgetary means wanted in on the lucrative potential of the subgenre. Troma Entertainment was no different, trying to make 1984’s “Splatter University” a player in the kill-em-all game, giving the feature a push as the next big thing in slaughterama entertainment. Director Richard W. Haines (“Class of Nuke ‘Em High”) tries to do his duty as a helmer of B-level hellraising, coming up (with the help of multiple screenwriters) with a decidedly formulaic take on murder, turning to a collegiate setting to unleash a knife-wielding killer on the students and staff. “Splatter University” provides some jolts with graphic special effects and a genuinely surprising conclusion, but Haines has no coin to work with, forced to keep stylistics to a bare minimum, while storytelling is generally ragged, fighting confusing detours and limp characterization while he tries to mount a successful whodunit, and one that’s covered in blood and guts.

Hungry for work, Julie (Forbes Riley) takes a position as a professor at St. Trinian’s University, claiming the teaching gig after the previous educator was murdered. While welcomed by wheelchair-bound Father Janson (Dick Biel), Julie finds trouble as she looks to settle into her new surroundings, with her class made up of lazy, disrespectful students, while pal Cynthia (Laura Gold) stokes the fires of paranoia, trying to keep the new hire away from colleague Mark (Ric Randig), who’s suspected of committing the brutal crime. As Julie seeks to teach her class, she’s distracted by her attraction to Mark, whose secretive ways only beguile her, and her growing fear of the area, with additional murders happening around town, with bodies eventually found on campus.

The story behind “Splatter University” reveals that the feature was shot in 1981, came up short in the run time department, and was put back into production to beef up the endeavor, which still only runs 76 minutes before the end credits. The three-year-long delay to bring the picture to screens didn’t give the effort time to marinate, with Haines unable (or unwilling) to fix many of the problems the movie encounters as it unfolds. There’s something of a prologue set in psychiatric hospital, where the killer makes his escape through basic trickery and a poor sense of human anatomy, trying to snuff out an orderly by first stabbing his crotch, which gives Haines his first taste of graphic violence, trying to live up to horror hound expectation by delivering painful kills.

The whole escaped patient idea is dismissed for most of the run time, with the action moving over to the college, where Julie finds a job she desperately needs, and an apartment from Mrs. Bloom (Mary Ellen David), who casually shares tales of neighborhood violence with her new tenant. Julie doesn’t seem to mind, taking over a teaching gig from a dead woman, more concerned about her professional performance than the brutal murder that occurred mere weeks earlier inside her classroom. “Splatter University” deals with a few logic leaps, and even though it’s slasher entertainment, the screenplay could do with a tightening of motivation and awareness. However, Julie’s screentime is soon split with the daily concerns of a handful of students, with one, Cathy (Kathy LaCommare), fearing she’s pregnant, while Tony’s (George Seminara) entire presence in the picture is to identify how callous the students are, showing no emotion when friends end up dead, preferring to focus on the real pleasures of life: marijuana, beer, and pawing at unwilling women. Horndog kids are a cornerstone of the subgenre, and Haines doesn’t disappoint when it comes to surveying careless behavior.

Splatter University Blu-ray Movie, Video Quality 

"Splatter University" makes its Blu-ray debut with an AVC encoded image (1.85:1 aspect ratio) presentation, sourced from the 16mm original camera negative. Wear and tear is encountered quite a bit during the viewing experience, which struggles with speckling and scratches, and chemical damage is periodically found. Roughness is there, but filmic qualities remain, with thick grain and decent detail, which looks particularly nice during establishing shots and New York City visits, offering urban dimension with buildings and streets. Facial particulars are engaging, often observing iffy make-up effects, and clothing stays textured, picking up on period wear and professional attire. Colors are pleasingly refreshed, with bright primaries for school interiors, offering deep reds with signage. Greenery is lush, and set decoration provides varied hues. Delineation is secure, handling evening stalking scenes with clarity.

Splatter University Blu-ray Movie, Audio Quality 

The 1.0 DTS-HD MA mix provides the basics in the "Splatter University" sound design while dealing with plenty of age-related issues, including pronounced stretches of damage, which warp the track, hitting scoring efforts the hardest. Intelligibility is acceptable despite some muddiness, with dialogue exchanges coming through adequately, offering Riley's professionalism some clarity. Synth throbs accordingly, with a few heightened cues that rattle speakers, and the music adds to suspense needs. Sound effects are blunt, without much definition. "Splatter University" isn't a technical marvel to begin with, and many of the mix's limitations are inherent issues.

Splatter University Blu-ray Movie, Special Features and Extras 

• Commentary #1 features director Richard W. Haines.

• Commentary #2 features The Hysteria Continues.

• Audio Interview (35:37) with Christopher Burke initially explores the composer's early industry interests, attending NYU film school with hopes to make it to Hollywood. Instead of glamour, Burke found Troma, working at a P.A. on "Mother's Day." The interviewee explores his contribution to the sound of "Splatter University" (which represented his first scoring gig), amassing a collection of synthesizers to create an electronic mood for the picture, and Burke goes into detail about synth instruments, exploring their different characteristics and recording capabilities. Talk turns to other jobs, including a stint working for director Len Anthony on "Vampires" and "Fright House." Burke closes with news about his current employment and his reflections on the industry.

• "Theme Song" (:54) is a snippet of the "Splatter University" score.

• Script Gallery (7:25) presents the original 1981 draft of "Splatter University," titled "Thou Shall Not Kill."

• Still Gallery (4:02) includes poster art, BTS snaps, publicity photos, promotional items, newspaper ads, marquee displays, and lobby trailer kiosks.

• Radio Spots (2:21) offer six commercials.

• T.V. Spot (:27, SD) is offered.

• And a Theatrical Trailer (1:44, SD) is included.

Splatter University Blu-ray Movie, Overall Score and Recommendation 

"Splatter University" isn't slickly made, struggling with continuity issues and obvious fatigue when it comes to summoning suspense. Many subplots trail off, and Julie, despite her educational achievements, isn't a bright protagonist. Positives are scattered but available for study, including a climax that offers decent shock value to balance out cliché, some mild commentary on the hypocrisies of organized religion, and excursions to a drive-in theater and NYC locations, to offer the picture some fresh air to go with all the hallway panic. It's not a well-made feature, barely hanging on as Haines sweats to work up proper R-rated energy, helped enormously by Christopher Burke's driving synth score. "Splatter University" is a great title in search of a better movie, more suited for slasher completists who are happy to devour anything that involves dumb people and a roving killer. Those new to the subgenre shouldn't start here.