Shorts Blu-ray Movie

Rating summary

Movie		3.0
Video		3.5
Audio		4.0
Extras		1.5
Overall		3.0

Shorts Blu-ray Movie Review

Style thoroughly dominates substance in Rodriguez's latest family film...

Reviewed by Kenneth Brown November 19, 2009

Imagine if you will an alternate universe in which an ever-chipper Quentin Tarantino abandoned his rental digs to assault moviegoers, not with a gut-punch tour de force called Reservoir Dogs, but with a hyperactive kids' flick brimming with tiny UFOs, towering robots, and a rock capable of making wishes come true. Imagine that and you'll have a fairly good idea of what to expect from Shorts, a scattershot joyride from writer/director/producer/cinematographer/editor/composer Robert Rodriguez designed to give eight-year-old boys the grade school equivalent of Pulp Fiction. Flashy, obvious, exaggerated, transparent, over stylized, and decidedly juvenile, it's a rainbow-ripened production without much subtlety or soul. But, as most any parent will agree, any film that leaves their five-year-old screaming "this... is... AWESOME!" deserves some extra leeway.

Don't ask...

Shorts has a story (several as a matter of fact), but for all its nonlinear bobbing and weaving, it's a surprisingly simple one. Essentially, when the young denizens of a corporation-run township discover a multi-colored wishing rock, all hell breaks loose. The kids are as diverse as the wishes they utter -- narrator Toe Thompson (Star Trek's Jimmy Bennett) longs for friendship, troublemaker Loogie (Trevor Gagnon) and his brothers (Leo Howard and Rebel Rodriguez) are more interested in super powers and forts, germophobe Nose Noseworthy (Jake Short) wants his father (William H. Macy) to be successful, and siblings Helvetica (Jolie Vanier) and Cole Black (Devon Gearhart) would love nothing more than to see their weak-willed classmates stuffed in trash cans -- and the madness that ensues is good, harmless, Nickelodeon-esque fun (of the flying crocodile and snot monster variety, of course). Their neighborhood even has a resident villain; a cold, calculating businessman named Mr. Black (a devilishly devious James Spader) whose invention, the Black Box, does... well, almost everything. His threats keep workers like Toe's parents (Leslie Mann and Jon Cryer) on task, but his demands are as ludicrous as the device that granted him such wealth and power in the first place. Inevitably, the kids have to thwart Black's plans, undo the mess they've made with the mysterious rock, find ways to redeem their oh-so-bumbling parents, and take responsibility for their self-serving wishes.

Make no mistake, Shorts will leave parents glancing at each other, the clock, and their remote. Its biggest saving grace is that it gives kids everything they could hope for. Robots, giants, space ships, lasers, telekinesis, flight, stretchy arms, slimy creatures, massive insects, waddling reptiles, castles, moats, poisonous snakes, staring contests, neverending chocolate bars, mind-reading babies, rocket bikes, healing abilities, and a slew of helpless adults who need their children to intervene before they tear each other apart. More than mere wish fulfillment, Rodriguez's six-episode family adventure taps directly into the minds of five to nine-year-old kids and grants them a series of fun scenarios sure to leave them bubbling over with enthusiasm. However -- and I stress however -- it offers thin lessons, superficial characters, and questionable conclusions. As noble as its messages are (the most valuable of which suggests children should disconnect themselves from technology and enjoy the company of actual people), it lacks sincerity and resonance. As well-intentioned as its morals are, it fails to hit the mark Rodriguez is clearly aiming for. Can't a kid just watch an entertaining movie? Sure, but when a flashbang children's film like Shorts is so seeped in life lessons and preachy subtext, I expect it to live up to its convictions.

Still, as much as I loathed its adult performances (minus James Spader's fantastically droll villain), as much as I winced at some of its young actors' deliveries, as much as I rolled my eyes at its bargain-bin special effects and spotty pacing, I can't completely trash a film my son adored so much. Every flick can't be aimed at thirty-year-old cinephiles, nor should they be. My childhood favorites don't hold up to today's standards, but I love them just the same. They helped induct me into the world of cinema, captured my fledgling imagination, and established a soft, comfortable home in my heart. Shorts is one of many movies that will be the same for this generation's YouTube babies and Facebook addicts. Amusing but indulgent, brisk but shallow, involving but cartoony, it's exactly what any savvy parent will expect. It certainly won't be a waste of your children's time, but unless you're taking advantage of its storylines to talk with your kids about communal responsibility and warm them of the dangers of technology, it will be a waste of yours.

Shorts Blu-ray Movie, Video Quality 

Shorts features an at-times problematic 1080p/VC-1 transfer that will leave viewers wondering whether the film was released theatrically or tossed onto home video straight away. Primaries are sometimes lacking (particularly for a colorful kids' flick), blacks aren't always properly resolved, contrast often overheats or flatlines, and skintones vary from scene to scene. In fact, Rodriguez's young actors occasionally look as if they've been modeled from plastic. Whether it traces back to rosy-cheeked vibrance or the director's persistent post-production tinkering, the results are the same. It doesn't help that several computer-generated creatures suffer from dated animation and cartoonish, low budget CG. That being said, any production related shortcomings should be attributed to the source itself rather than Warner's technical transfer. Thankfully, overall clarity is impressive, edge definition is sharp, textures are fairly refined (albeit a tad inconsistent), and several key shots are positively striking. Yes, artifacting occasionally peppers the bright skies and noticeable banding pops up in each segment's title card, but the image is, by and large, quite clean. Aliasing, noise, crush, and significant macroblocking are nowhere to be found, and ringing, while present throughout, rarely interferes with the integrity of the presentation. Regardless, I was a bit underwhelmed. Warner's presentation is decent, above average even, but won't wow discerning videophiles of any age.

Shorts Blu-ray Movie, Audio Quality 

Shorts' sound design is as full of Saturday morning listlessness as its visuals, but Warner's Dolby TrueHD 5.1 surround track seems more capable than its video transfer. Dialogue is clear, intelligible at all times, and nicely prioritized amongst the lumbering robots, giant wasps, legions of UFOs, and waddling crocodiles that frequent the film. Likewise, LFE output is robust and rear speaker activity is engaging. I wouldn't go so far as to call either one remarkable, but considering the Cocoa Puff charm of Toe and Loogie's misadventures, both are more than adequate. The track really comes to life after the first two vignettes -- with the sudden arrival of an insta-castle, a botched business soiree, a ravenous snot monster, and an boys-choir "Helvetica" chant that invades every channel -- and seems to take pleasure in drawing its young listeners deep within the chaotic confines of its soundfield. Directionality is sometimes as two-dimensional as the film's character development, but remains well within the bounds of a live-action cartoon. Pans are buttery, dynamics are effective, and high-pitched wheens and sheengs are perfectly stable. All things considered, I doubt Shorts could sound any better than it does here.

Shorts Blu-ray Movie, Special Features and Extras 

Shorts skirts by with a slim supplemental package aimed squarely at the kiddies. "The Magic of Shorts" (HD, 9 minutes) is a standard, clip-heavy special effects featurette hosted by an overly reserved, soft-spoken Rodriguez; "Show and Tell" (HD, 5 minutes) introduces the film's young cast, follows the overactive troublemakers around the set, and reveals what they would wish for if given the opportunity; "Cooking School" (HD, 10 minutes) finds the director and his daughter making Chocolate Chip Volcano Cookies (treats that admittedly look super tasty); and "Film School" (HD, 10 minutes) gives Rodriguez the chance to show kids how to make the most of their homemade movies. From beginning to end, my son adored every feature. I was less than enthused. Ah well, at least all of the disc's video content is presented in high definition.

Shorts Blu-ray Movie, Overall Score and Recommendation 

Shorts is big, dumb, whizzbang fun primarily aimed at five to nine-year-old boys. It succeeds in almost everything it sets out to do, but falls far too short on far too many occasions to stand alongside cinema's true family classics. Alas, the Blu-ray edition is a mixed bag as well. While it includes a strong TrueHD audio track, its video transfer is weak in the knees and its supplemental package consists of a whopping thirty-four minutes of kid-friendly features. Ultimately, children will cheer, but adults will be less than enthused.