Panther Squad Blu-ray Movie

Rating summary

Movie		3.0
Video		2.5
Audio		3.0
Extras		2.5
Overall		2.5

Panther Squad Blu-ray Movie Review

Reviewed by Brian Orndorf February 23, 2021

In the great push to find cult films worthy of celebration and mockery, I’m not sure how 1984’s “Panther Squad” has fallen through the cracks. It’s pure ridiculousness from director Pierre Chevalier, a longtime exploitation helmer who, in his last feature, decides to go nuts, pitting Sybil Danning against an armed space protection organization bent on trying to stop a global communication device from escaping Earth. Or something like that. “Panther Squad” has a lot of action and assorted distractions, but secure storytelling isn’t a top priority for the production. Technical expertise is also politely refused by Chevalier, who elects to march forward with whatever he’s got, out to create a global adventure with only a few locations, a limited cast, and Danning’s sheer determination to deliver an Eastwood-ian lead performance of pure attitude and physical might.

The New Organization of Nations are planning to launch a global communications ship known as the “Space Jeep” into orbit, creating a new frontier of worldwide connection. Standing in the way of such progress are the evil grumps at the Clean Space Movement, who decide to prevent a successful mission by kidnapping a top astronaut, holding her hostage and demanding N.O.O.N. pull the Space Jeep off course. World leaders are terrified, bringing in Ilona (Sybil Danning), “The Panther,” to save the day. The mercenary gears up for battle, paired with Frank (Jack Taylor), her alcoholic contact, to help find the C.S.M.’s location and collect the missing astronaut. Backing Ilona up is her strike team of young warriors, with the Panther Squad called into duty to help prevent a space program disaster.

“Panther Squad” establishes its tone during the main titles, which go on for quite some time (even misspelling Danning’s name) and are set to the anthemic rock song, “She’s Tough and Tender,” which is meant to sum up the Panther Squad’s level of heroic engagement. Unfortunately, such sonic drive doesn’t exactly represent the rest of the feature, which looks like footage from three different movies presented to Chevalier for assembly, adding a blindfold to the editorial process. “Panther Squad” is all over the place, but it does open with some dramatic direction, highlighting the power play between N.O.O.N. and C.S.M., with the terrorist(?) group looking to make their message heard via a high-profile kidnapping. An astronaut is taken, and the Panther Squad is brought in to clean up the mess.

A straightforward opening is soon clouded by supporting characters, with Frank brought in for some reason, possibly inserted into the tale as comic relief, with the day-drunk happier to sit down than help, and he enjoys ogling the fighting force. Ilona works her way around vague clues and strange contacts, with these sequences mostly reserved to showcase Danning’s fight skills, sold through overactive stunt men and cruddy slow motion, which doesn’t emphasize feats of sheer room-clearing awesomeness in the way Chevalier intends. “Panther Squad” actually takes its time arranging this chess game of goons and allies, which doesn’t hold up to any scrutiny, mostly acting as filler to beef up the run time and allow the production to showcase its Spanish and Belgium locations.

Danning gets tough and changes into her butt-kicking pleather outfit, but the Panther Squad arrives 35 minutes into the film, which is an eternity when dealing with material this thin. Ilona’s gang arrives to get things done, and the effort noticeably perks up with the introduction, signifying that the screenplay is past trying to explain itself and is now ready for action. However, adventure can wait, as Ilona orders her mercenaries to wait a day before launching their attack, spending an afternoon in bikinis by the pool while the poor astronaut is miles away fighting for her own safety, including a deep woods escape attempt that’s purely invented to add some screen time to the movie, which only runs 77 minutes.

The ladies of the Panther Squad bring their own special magic to the feature, taking on bad dudes with half-speed martial arts, improvisational fight choreography, and a few gadgets, including a hair dryer that doubles as a flame thrower. “Panther Squad” gets wacky when Ilona and her warriors get ready to rock (in heels!), giving the picture needed energy as the story becomes a team effort, watching the mercs use their feminine appeal to dazzle male targets, while Ilona leads the mission through shootouts, fist fights, and a motorcycle chase, gifting Danning moments of screen authority, which she sells quite well. There’s not much acting going on, but that’s not the point of “Panther Squad,” which plays like a backyard production, using lots of stock footage to create the appearance of a space program and global travel. And editing is more of a suggestion than a reality, with random cuts found throughout the film, creating an almost surreal viewing experience at times.

And for fans of deus ex machina, “Panther Squad” contains a doozy of an ending, finding the production in a hurry to simply ends things with a “last resort” magical military device.

Panther Squad Blu-ray Movie, Video Quality 

Billed as "a crisp new HD transfer," the AVC encoded image (1.78:1 aspect ratio) presentation for "Panther Squad" is not without many issues that disrupt a smooth viewing experience. Encoding has its limitations, with the image slipping into blockiness. There's been no effort here to create a consistent color grade for the feature, which changes hues from scene to scene. Some shots look natural, while others retain a slightly more purplish tint. Detail isn't sharp, with softness present, but some body particulars are lightly defined at times, along with costuming choices, which favor smoother pleather for Danning's wardrobe. Locations are passably dimensional. Source is in satisfactory condition, with some warped frames, scratches, and speckling.

Panther Squad Blu-ray Movie, Audio Quality 

The 2.0 Dolby Digital mix isn't built to impress, presenting a basic understanding of dialogue exchanges. Voices aren't crisp, but intelligibility isn't a problem. Music cues are dialed down to a certain degree, delivering a quieter level of instrumentation. Sound effects offer no real weight, but snappy gunfire and roaring motors are appreciable. Hiss is mild and pops are periodic.

Panther Squad Blu-ray Movie, Special Features and Extras 

• Commentary features star Sybil Danning.

• And a Newly Created Trailer (1:32, HD) is included.

Panther Squad Blu-ray Movie, Overall Score and Recommendation 

Despite provocative cover art and a "bikini team kill squad" premise, "Panther Squad" is shockingly tame, containing no nudity or heavy language. It's a softer R-rated offering, keeping things worked up with scenes of violence, which aren't all that graphic. The writing looks to create a new franchise with Ilona and her team, and it honestly triggers a desire to see more from the character and her special missions (a wish unfulfilled). "Panther Squad" has no real technical achievements, basically spending most of the run time just trying to exist (one authority figure simply has a background sheet with a cityscape printed on it to identify his urban location), but there's fun to be had with it, especially for those who crave no-budget weirdness. Danning tries her best to get something going with the endeavor, and her professionalism is welcome, giving the effort a defined tough person to help provide focus for a movie that needs the stability.