Rating summary

Movie		3.5
Video		2.5
Audio		3.5
Extras		2.0
Overall		2.0

Never Too Young to Die Blu-ray Movie Review

Reviewed by Dr. Svet Atanasov April 20, 2017

Gil Bettman's "Never Too Young to Die" (1986) arrives on Blu-ray courtesy of Shout Factory. The supplemental features on the disc include an original TV spot for the film; audio commentary by pop culture historian Russell Dyball; and vintage standard-definition presentation of the film. In English, with optional English SDH subtitles for the main feature. Region-A "locked".

It can be done

Prince’s protégé Vanity (whose real name was Denise Katrina Matthews) appeared in a couple of kitschy action films during the early ‘80s that I think sum up just about everything that made the decade truly special. The first, The Last Dragon, was remastered by Sony Pictures and has been out on Blu-ray for a while. The second, Too Young to Die, is only now transitioning to Blu-ray, but the release is sourced from an old master that makes it awfully difficult to appreciate the film’s extravagant style.

The plot is a classic ‘80s mish-mash of bizarre ideas and developments. A very kinky singer named Velvet Von Ragner (Kiss icon Gene Simmons) is the leader of a large gang of brainwashed savages (looking a lot like the crazies from Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome) who are hell-bent on collapsing an entire town. Ragner and his boys plan to dump some deadly chemicals in a giant tank on the outskirts of the town that redistributes its water, but they can’t pull off their plan without a special computer disc that is in the possession of government agent Drew Stargrove (George Lazenby). During a botched secret mission, Ragner captures the agent, and after he refuses to surrender the disc kills him. Shortly after the agent is buried, his clueless son, Lance (John Stamos), bumps into the mysterious Danja Deering (Vanity), who reveals to him that she was his father’s most trusted partner. Against all odds, they team up and confront Ragner, but their work is seriously jeopardized after they realize that they can’t seem to keep their hands off of each other’s bodies.

The film is so ridiculous that it is virtually impossible not to like. It literally has endless sequences that easily could have been part of MTV’s early programming when its producers knew how to blend over-the-top colorful content and catchy music and were still bold enough to ignore the proponents of political correctness. In other words, it delivers the type of kitschy R-rated entertainment that basically made the ‘80s such a great decade.

Something else that I wish to mention in this article that has always been a major factor behind my positive response to the film is the diverse selection of costumes, makeup and hairstyles. I think that the excess on display actually made a lot of the actors significantly more enthusiastic about their characters, and as a result the entire film oozes a very authentic energy that can be irresistibly attractive. The silliness obviously never disappears, but the fact that the actors are not only not bothered by it but appear fully immersed into it makes a dramatic difference.

The film was lensed by cinematographer and director David Worth, who would go on to work with Jean-Claude Van Damme on two of his best ‘80s action films, Bloodsport and Kickboxer.

The original soundtrack features a couple of excellent tracks, but the best comes from Dee Dee Belson who sings the ultra sexy It Could Be You. (A few years after this film, Belson had another terrific contribution to the romantic comedy The Boyfriend School).

Never Too Young to Die Blu-ray Movie, Video Quality 

Presented in its original aspect ratio of 1.85:1, encoded with MPEG-4 AVC and granted a 1080p transfer, Gil Bettman's Too Young to Die arrives on Blu-ray courtesy of Shout Factory.

The release is sourced from an older master with some very obvious issues. For example, both outdoor and indoor footage consistently lack the type of depth that the high-definition format should deliver. The indoor/nighttime footage also exhibits massive crushing. Perhaps the most serious issue, however, is the lack of a proper grain structure. The release is poorly encoded and as a result the indoor/darker footage routinely appears overwhelmed by noise (see screencaptures #8 and 9). Additionally, throughout the entire film it is very easy to see distracting smearing that is typically introduced by filtering corrections, though in this case a lot of it actually appears to be a byproduct of the poor encoding (see screencaptures #10, 11, 12, and 15). To be perfectly clear, some grain is retained during select close-ups, but large panoramic and indoor shots are frequently and quickly collapsed by the awkward flatness (see screencapture #5). Some of the primary colors are rather decent, but saturation is unconvincing and there are full ranges of nuances that are missing. Image stability is good, but when projected the film does not have the proper organic fluidity that it should have when it transitions to Blu-ray. My score is 2.75/5.00. (Note: This is a Region-A "locked" Blu-ray release. Therefore, you must have a native Region-A or Region-Free player in order to access its content).

Never Too Young to Die Blu-ray Movie, Audio Quality 

There is only one standard audio track on this Blu-ray release: English DTS-HD Master Audio 2.0. Optional English SDH subtitles are provided for the main feature.

There are parts of the film where the lossless track struggles to reproduce the intensity of the action, with some of the mass sequences (especially inside the club) in particular sounding uncharacteristically flat. Elsewhere, however, clarity and depth range from decent to very good. My guess is that if the audio is fully remastered a lot of these inconsistencies will be eliminated. There are no audio dropouts or digital distortions to report.

Never Too Young to Die Blu-ray Movie, Special Features and Extras 

• TV Spot - original TV spot for Too Young to Die. In English, not subtitled. (1 min, 1080p).

• Audio Commentary - in this audio commentary, pop culture historian Russell Dyball offers an outstanding analysis of Never Too Young to Die and discusses the socio-cultural climate in America during the '80s when the film was completed. If you liked the many colorful films the decade produced, I strongly recommend listening to the commentary in its entirety.

• VHS - a vintage standard-definition presentation of Never Too Young to Die.

Never Too Young to Die Blu-ray Movie, Overall Score and Recommendation 

I was very much looking forward to Shout Factory's release of Never Too Young to Die because recently the label has done some terrific work with a number of cult and popular genre titles. Most unfortunately, I have to confirm that this release is a major and regrettable misfire for the label. It is sourced from an older master with some serious issues, and on top of that it is poorly encoded. (My personal opinion is that the inclusion of vintage VHS transfers as bonus features only negatively affects the quality of the main presentation, which is the most important content on every Blu-ray release). Hopefully, some foreign label will take the time to produce a new master and create a quality special edition of Never Too Young to Die. It is a genuine '80s trashy classic, and with the recent passing of Vanity this certainly seemed like the right opportunity to properly reintroduce it to a new generation of younger viewers. SKIP IT.