Monster High: Haunted Blu-ray Movie

Rating summary

Movie		2.0
Video		2.5
Audio		4.0
Extras		1.0
Overall		2.5

Monster High: Haunted Blu-ray Movie Review

Hazy hauntings.

Reviewed by Martin Liebman March 21, 2015

Writing a review of a Monster High movie seems almost like an exercise in futility. The movies sell themselves through merchandising and a general popular culture inundation from which the target audience cannot escape. And the target audience probably doesn't care what some stuffy reviewer has to say about the movie, not insofar as its story and content, not as it pertains to the picture quality presentation, and not the pluses and minuses of its soundtrack. Supplements? Maybe. They'll be glad to know that two short features, which total around seven minutes in torture, er, runtime, are included. Even parents have probably already decided whether Monster High is right for their kids or not; those who say "yes" are probably already working the checkbook to find a way to work Haunted into the budget, and those who say "no" are probably donning earmuffs to drown out the cries of frustration and anger ("but I'll never ask for anything again, ever! Promise!" And, yes, guilty as charged. See, there were these five Dinobots this one time back in 1980-something...). For those few who slip between the cracks, here's the rest of the completely unenthusiastic but dutifully penned review...

But where's Batterson?

Monster High's very own gossip columnist Spectra Vondergeist (voiced by Erin Fitzgerald) is in desperate need of a scoop. Her readers are antsy for a new blog update, and she's doesn't have a drop of juicy news for them. When she's told that the local werewolf population has come down with "werefleas," its an instant hit on her site and an instant stain on the school. She learns a valuable lesson about checking sources and facts before going to print. Meanwhile, Draculaura (voiced by Debi Derryberry) thinks she's being haunted. Spectra, Monster High's resident ghost, takes it upon herself to sort things out. The girls catch a glimpse of her traveling to another dimension. They follow and meet River Styxx (voiced by Ashley Peterson), a girl who ferries them to an all-ghost school. When the school's principal, Revenant (voiced by Karen Strassman), figures out what's happening, she makes it her mission to make sure Spectra stays where she belongs. Revenant runs a tight ship -- too tight for the school's ghosts like Porter Geiss (voiced by Todd Haberkorn), a rebellious artist -- that the girls decide needs a little loosening. Now, the girls from Monster High, along with some "spirited" new friends, must join forces to save Spectra and set things right in the ghost world.

Monster High: Haunted's core story theme deals in the danger of spreading disinformation and rumor as fact before verifying sources or going through some kind of fact-checking process. The tedious film, however, moves on to other, less interesting details as the girls meet new people at a different school (not wholly dissimilar from their adventures in Freaky Fusion in which they traveled through time rather than dimensions) and deal with an assortment of crazy shenanigans that require them to work together, reach an understanding of their differences, and make use of both their shared strengths and their diversity to get things back to normal. It's another cookie-cutter Monster High tale that, for non target audiences, anyway, drags and drags and drags and d r a g s and drags some more. The characters are largely one dimensional beings who stand apart more on their physical appearance than their inward personas, as much as the series would like to pretend otherwise (that observation coming from someone who has admittedly never absorbed a drop of anything related to Monster High outside of the movies popping up on the Blu-ray.com review schedule). Haunted, specifically, brings nothing new to the table but for some new faces in the ghost realm, some of whom are sympathetic to the girls of Monster High, some of whom are not, which is really pretty standard new character interaction dynamics across the board for the series. Certainly fans will enjoy the new adventure, but those who have previously been bitten by the series but seen their enthusiasm drained probably won't find a rejuvenated opinion of Monster High with this outing.

Tangent: why is it that every Monster High movie involves some lightbulb moment of moral clarity that's conveniently forgotten in the next? In every movie, the girls of Monster High learn some valuable lesson about life, friendship, self-image, work ethic, or other admittedly positive notions. But come time for the next adventure and it's all gone out the window, or at the very least gone is one's ability to apply previous knowledge to another situation, to adapt and critically think. Everything is heaved aside in order to go through the same song-and-dance all over again. Maybe the girls should settle down and learn about application, about carrying ideals into other areas of their lives and coming to understand that life is an intricate web of ideas and situations in which, sometimes, previous lessons may be applied to current and future problems. Oh well. At least the movies are promoting something good along the way, but they'd be much more valuable if they weren't worked in such a way so as to promote selective idealism and instead built a larger understanding of how the journey through life really works.

Monster High: Haunted Blu-ray Movie, Video Quality 

Monster High: Haunted features another cruddy, muddy, unattractive 1080p transfer. The source material isn't pretty to say the least. It looks cheap and feels cheap, like there's a haze lingering over the image. Add that the movie mostly takes place in a hazy ghost world and it's double the displeasure in Haunted. Details never amount to much in the overt softness. Lines are adequately well defined, but raw detail is lacking. Colors are decent, for the most part, with suitably popping purples and pinks, but all but the most aggressive shades more or less get lost in the crummy overlying animation. Light banding and aliasing are also problematic, but not to destructive extent. The screenshots pretty much tell the entire story. If they look bad, then pass and demand the movie be made to look better out of the gate.

Monster High: Haunted Blu-ray Movie, Audio Quality 

Monster High: Haunted's DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1 lossless soundtrack is at least a winner. It's big, aggressive, and enveloping. Music -- notably the opening title, carefully engineered, faux Rock, sugary Pop anthem -- enjoys solid clarity and good spacing with a healthy surround support. Instrumental score offers an appropriately moody, drifty, spooky flavor. Nice light public announcement reverberations echo through the stage early on, as does crowd applause. Minor effects like fluttering lights and gentle ambience are handled well, while, some bigger action pieces like rattly chains and crashes play with suitable weight and aggression. Dialogue is a bit shrill, but that seems par for the course for the style of voice work.

Monster High: Haunted Blu-ray Movie, Special Features and Extras 

Monster High: Haunted contains a couple of extra animated shorts. Inside the Blu-ray case, buyers will also find a DVD copy of the film, a voucher for a UV/iTunes digital copy, and a fold-out advertisement for various products related to the film.

• Animated Short: Lochness Lorna (1080p, Dolby Digital 2.0, 1.78:1, 3:36): The new "fear books" are in and there's also a new monster exchange student named Lorna, daughter of the famed Loch Ness Monster.
• Animated Short: Sayonara Draculaura (1080p, Dolby Digital 2.0, 1.78:1, 3:33): It's the last day to sign up for a semester abroad. Draculaura must decide where she's going to go.
• Previews (1080p): Monster High: Freaky Fusion, Monster High: Frights, Camera, Action!, Monster High Clawesome Double Feature, Monster High: 13 Wishes, Monster High: Ghouls Rule, and Monster High Double Feature.

Monster High: Haunted Blu-ray Movie, Overall Score and Recommendation 

Monster High: Haunted offers another story clouded by the same overtones and another façade clouded by the same hazy animation. This time, the creators have doubled down by plopping the hazy animation into a hazy world for a double-dose of haziness. Add to that a repetitive style and flow and the movie is sure to flop with anyone and everyone whose bedroom, notebooks, school locker, backpack, and favorite T-shirts aren't adorned with Monster High characters. Universal's Blu-ray release of Monster High: Haunted features tired video, aggressive audio, and a couple of short animated features. Fans should buy, everyone else should skip.