Mastermind Blu-ray Movie

Rating summary

Movie		0.5
Video		2.0
Audio		2.0
Extras		0.0
Overall		1.0

Mastermind Blu-ray Movie Review

Reviewed by Brian Orndorf May 16, 2018

I’m sure someone, somewhere holds 1976’s “Mastermind” in high esteem. Everyone has their guilty pleasures, and there’s certainly a fanbase for star Zero Mostel. However, I believe most people sitting down to watch the feature will experience a distinct urge to shut it off five minutes into the viewing. Actually shot in 1969 (before being shelved for the next seven years), “Mastermind” is one of those “really?” movies that makes one wonder how certain projects actually make it all the way to production without anyone raising objections over content and a general lack of funny business. It’s a horrible comedy, carrying on without awareness of its insensitivity (granted, it was a different time, but still) and lack of punchlines, solely reliant on Mostel to come up with bits of physical comedy to save the day.

The idea driving “Mastermind” is a “Pink Panther” riff, but instead of an Englishman playing a cartoon Frenchman, here’s an American trying to play a Japanese sleuth. Mostel portrays Inspector Hoku, a master investigator brought in to figure out why so many companies and countries want to possess a special android doll created for the toy market. There’s a partner in Crouchback (Gawn Grainger) and a love interest in Nikki (Keiko Kishi), but “Mastermind” is mostly handed over to Hoku, who hits the trail in search of clues, taking him to various establishments around Kyoto, Japan, including nightclubs, spas, and offices, which permit Mostel to mix it up with various locals. Death emerges in the form of a poisoned dart that kills victims immediately, but the rest is relatively mild stuff, unless one counts the yellowface aspects of the movie, which are amplified by the screenplay’s insistence that Hoku be a master of martial arts and enjoy multiple fantasy sequences where he’s a famous samurai chasing Nikki, who’s now a virgin princess. Why? Because the production is trying to fill 80 minutes, and that’s not easy to do with a bland mystery and Mostel drowning in stupidity during every screen appearance.

Mastermind Blu-ray Movie, Video Quality 

The AVC encoded image (1.78:1 aspect ratio) presentation is sourced from an older master, keeping the viewing experience dull and flat. Detail isn't satisfactory, with softness dominating throughout, weakening the power of close-ups and muting the make-up work on Mostel. Locations are also robbed of dimension. Grain is chunky. Colors are feeble, stifling cultural hues and period costuming. City life doesn't fare much better outside of the hottest neon signs. Skintones are acceptable, but never truly fresh. Delineation is passable.

Mastermind Blu-ray Movie, Audio Quality 

"Mastermind" has some real trouble in the audio department, with the 2.0 DTS-HD MA sound mix failing to remain consistent or even appealing during the listening event. It's a muffled track, with some serious dips in clarity, and it's often overwhelmed by scoring cues and soundtrack selections. During one scene set inside a nightclub, entire lines of dialogue are drowned out by the music, making it a little difficult to follow what's going on (no subtitles have been included). Hiss is an issue as well. Not helping the cause is dubbing, which helps to kneecap already challenging exposition delivered by Japanese actors just getting used to the English language. Perhaps it's a blessing that some of these deadly exchanges are ruined by age, but Blu-ray customers deserve proper clarity.

Mastermind Blu-ray Movie, Special Features and Extras 

There is no supplementary material on this disc.

Mastermind Blu-ray Movie, Overall Score and Recommendation 

It's hard to classify "Mastermind" as hateful. It's just dumb. Real dumb (William Peter Blatty wrote an early draft and promptly removed his name from picture), trusting in the comfort of stereotypes to handle the mysteries of Japan, which extend to seppuku jokes (but of course). It's all meant to be a wacky Clouseau-esque ride, but for that to work, the writing actually needs to cough up some honest-to-god jokes, and not just offer extended scenes of Mostel as Hoku challenging people, including the living doll, to martial art showdowns. Again, if "Mastermind" happens to be a personal favorite, more power to you. I'm only sorry the Blu-ray presentation isn't up to snuff. For those new to the feature, perhaps running is the opposite direction of the disc is the best idea. Avoiding such production foolishness will contribute to a longer, happier life.