Rating summary

Movie		3.5
Video		3.0
Audio		4.0
Extras		4.0
Overall		3.5

Hardware Wars Blu-ray Movie Review

Reviewed by Jeffrey Kauffman May 1, 2024

In the, "hey, maybe the universe does have a sense of humor" department, Hardware Wars showed up in my review queue just as I have been wending my way through two rather elaborate Star Wars adjacent series which aired on Disney+ and which are both new to home theater media (in both 1080 and 4K UHD), Obi-Wan Kenobi: The Complete Series and Andor: The Complete First Season (reviews forthcoming in the next few days). Hardware Wars may not have the production values of those two series, but it has something arguably just as important, namely a completely goofy sense of humor that revisits the "original" Star Wars film (that would be Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope for you persnickety types) in a decidedly (and intentionally) lo-fi manner that substitutes everyday household appliances for things like the Millennium Falcon.

Just listing off the "new, improved" character names may be enough to indicate the juvenile but still frequently hilarious sensibility of Hardware Wars. Human characters include Fluke Starbucker (Scott Mathews), Princess Anne-Droid (Cindy Furgatch), Ham Salad (Bob Knickerbocker) and Augie "Ben" Doggie (Jeff Hale). More robotic types include 4-Q-2 (Frank Robertson), who looks suspiciously similar to a featured character in The Wizard of Oz 4K, and Artie Deco, who looks suspicious similar to a cannister vacuum cleaner. Verbal humor is about what you'd expect, but some of the sight gags, including the patently ridiculous use of everyday household items in the place of high tech wonderments, are often hilarious.

Hardware Wars Blu-ray Movie, Video Quality 

Hardware Wars is presented on Blu-ray courtesy of MVD Visual's MVD Rewind imprint with an AVC encoded 1080p transfer in 1.33:1. The back cover of this release states this is a "brand new 2K transfer from the only known surviving element, a 16mm reversal release print". A text card prefacing the short provides a bit more information, as follows:

Hardware Wars was scanned in 2K resolution from the only known surviving element, a 16mm reversal release print.

Due to poor handling of the camera original during the editing process, a large amount of dirt and damage is inherent to the production, especially during the film's frequent optical effect and dupe sequences. As this damage has been present since the film was initially released in 1978, it has been retained here, as removing or even reducing it would not accurately represent how audiences first experienced the film.

If I may momentarily be as insouciant as Hardware Wars itself, I might also add that "removing or even reducing" dirt or other damage might have been unfeasible from a budgetary standpoint. What's a bit odd about this presentation is that the supplements include a 2012 HD Master which some online sources state was culled from the original camera negative, which may beg the question as to what happened between then and now. The video quality of the supplemental version may in fact offer better clarity and contrast and a less splotchy looking grain field than the apparently newer scan, but at least it's on the disc for fans to do their own comparison viewing. (For just one example of the quality differences, compare the scene of Fluke "repairing" Artie Deco and discovering Princess Anne-Droid's message.) What's on tap here is often pretty rough looking, with a very gritty grain field that has obviously not been "managed" in any way, shape or form. Detail levels are at least decent, and elements like the obvious strings supporting the flying objects can still be made out quite clearly.

Hardware Wars Blu-ray Movie, Audio Quality 

Hardware Wars features either LPCM 2.0 or LPCM 2.0 Mono audio, and I'd stick with the stereo track for a number of reasons. The original 2.0 mono track is fine, really, but it does reveal quite a bit more damage and a somewhat muffled sound when compared to the brighter, clearer stereo version. Both tracks deliver the goofy dialogue and voiceover along with score and sound effects elements with reasonable force, though the film's lo-fi ambience certainly pervades to the audio as well as the video. Optional English subtitles are available.

Hardware Wars Blu-ray Movie, Special Features and Extras 

• Hardware Wars 2012 HD Master (HD; 12:54)


• Hardware Wars Director's Cut (SD; 10:16) is intentionally nutty and arguably even more lo-fi than the "finished" version, and seems to consist at least in part of outtakes.


• Hardware Wars Foreign Version (SD; 11:15) is about what you'd expect with some indescribable language and some questionable on screen fonts and/or orthography.


• 1978 Creature Features Interview (SD; 6:04) offers a supposedly candid interview with Enrie Fosselius, which of course means the entire thing is a joke. This has some quaint tracking issues at the bottom of the frame.


• Hardware Wars Saves Christmas (SD; 6:10) improbably interpolates the Hardware Wars characters into a North Pole setting.


• Hardware Wars Prequel Featurette (SD; 5:23) is a somewhat weirdly titled sendup of Antiques Roadshow.


• Awards Reel (HD; 1:09) offers a look at some of the high profile awards Hardware Wars has received, if by high profile it's meant the award bestowers were probably high at the time of the ceremonies.


• Porklips Now (SD; 21:40) is Fosselius' sendup of Apocalypse Now, including billing himself as Ernie Ford Fosselius.


• Plan 9.1 From Outer Space (SD; 20:47) reworks Ed Wood's masterpiece (?) with puppets, to considerable comic effect.


• Director's Commentary is another complete goof from Fosselius (including his echo laden interior thoughts as the commentary devolves into gibberish). This is accessible under the Audio Menu.

The keepcase features a reversible sleeve and encloses a folded mini poster. Packaging features a slipcover.

Hardware Wars Blu-ray Movie, Overall Score and Recommendation 

For me personally, Hardware Wars easily outpaces Spaceballs, and the fact that Fosselius made this on an incredibly tiny budget just gives it extra charm. Video quality is what it is, though it does strike me as strange that the 2012 HD Master offered on this disc wasn't revisited rather than this apparently newer scan of a secondary element. The supplements, while mostly in standard definition, are often hilarious. Recommended.