Rating summary

Movie		2.5
Video		4.5
Audio		4.5
Extras		2.5
Overall		3.5

Armored Blu-ray Movie Review

The epitome of the "remarkably unremarkable" movie watching experience.

Reviewed by Martin Liebman March 13, 2010

Not everybody's a hero.

Three cheers for Armored, a movie that's bound to make audiences stand up and take notice -- for just how exceptionally good it is at being extraordinarily mundane. Nary an original bone in its body, Armored is as standard a flick as they come; sure, it's well-made, fairly-acted, and not all that much of a chore to watch, but it's that last little spark -- that feeling that something special is going on -- that really keeps viewers glued to their seats for every breathtakingly predictable plot twist that Director Nimród Antal (Vacancy) throws their way. This Heist/Buddy/Action/Drama hybrid is made up of several elements, none of which are explored beyond a startlingly superficial level. Despite its namesake, Armored is anything but tough and thick; this is flimsy but workmanlike filmmaking that stands up to a lazy watch but not intense scrutiny, for below its thinly-layered but stout exterior lies a hollow interior where there's no support structure to keep the movie from collapsing under anything but a cursory glance in its direction. Ultimately, Armored is a loud and mindless romp that's well-executed and worth a watch, but it offers absolutely no substance beyond serving as a passable means of killing off ninety or so minutes on a particularly boring day.

'Armored,' class of 2009.

Fresh from a tour of duty in the Middle East, young Ty Hackett (Columbus Short, Quarantine) is struggling to make ends meet. His parents have recently passed away, leaving him to pay for a house he can't afford and at the same time care for his brash and artistic younger brother Jimmy (Andre Jamal Kinney), who is in danger of being placed into foster care by the state. Trying to keep what's left of his family afloat and whole, Ty has taken a job as an armored car officer alongside his Godfather Mike Cochrone (Matt Dillon, Wild Things), a loving fatherly type who is always looking out for Ty and Jimmy's best interests. Mike and his team -- Quinn (Jean Reno, Léon: The Professional), Baines (Laurence Fishburne, Event Horizon), Palmer (Amaury Nolasco, "Prison Break"), Eckehart (Milo Ventimiglia, Rocky Balboa), and Dobbs (Skeet Ulrich, The Craft) -- develop a plan to hijack their own shipment of cash; Ty's offered the opportunity to take part and, in the process, secure his and his brothers' financial futures. Ty ultimately succumbs to the temptation to partake in what Mike hails as the perfect scheme that seems destined to go according to plan and make everyone very rich -- unless someone were to decide they no longer want to be a part of it.

Armored is the sort of movie that almost defies critical examination because it's so firmly entrenched in absolute mediocrity that there's little to say about, good, bad, or otherwise. Nothing about this movie strikes one as worthy of praise, while nothing about it stands out as abhorrently bad, either. Armored is good enough on its own merits to warrant a fleeting shrug of the shoulders; a PG-13 movie with little bite and even less originality, the film offers some standard action scenes, predictable plot developments, bland dialogue, and shallow characters that all make up the surface of a movie that's admirably crafted but completely forgettable otherwise. Armored's transparent A-to-B-to-C story arc is anything but mysterious; the film thrives not on surprising its audiences with well-paced action or craftily-hidden secrets but instead lulls them into a comfort zone much like the soda and popcorn that makes for a good companion to a movie like this. It's easy, soothing, relaxing, but ultimately nothing but empty calories placed in fancy containers and given too much hype and at too high a cost for what's provided. Likewise, Armored has a mass-produced feel to it where everything about the movie seems so familiar and, indeed, the movie itself is nothing but a giant cliché of every genre device and stereotype, from the edgy but still fairly family-friendly tone to the flock of characters that are all developed only to the point that their primary trait will in some way bring about the conflict or play some part in its resolution.

What makes Armored fairly unique is that Director Nimród Antal manages to keep the movie flowing and maintain a modicum of interest from his audience despite the film's tour through every cliché and predictable arc in the book. He gives the movie a fun, jovial feel that's reflected in the series of breezy and surprisingly natural performances from the cast. The collection of primaries demonstrate a strong chemistry together; they're believable -- perhaps even seamless -- as a group of longtime friends and co-workers, but unfortunately, the fun stops there. What little development there is seems to fall by the wayside in the film's second and third act when characters seem to give up on a whim what are painted in the first act as lifelong bonds, relationships, and personal codes in favor of the money that's suddenly at the heart of the conflict. In turn, the characters -- and Mike in particular -- lack believability because of the sudden conflict between their later actions versus their established parameters, making the film's opening segment seem like nothing more than an effort to pad the movie's already anemic runtime. Though Antal maintains a personal feel throughout the film -- shooting characters in contrast with one another and/or in close-up -- it's difficult to become better acquainted with them considering the lackluster development that goes only as far as the basics of the script requires. Armored, then, fails in its efforts to add additional drama and heart to the movie. It's difficult to care about characters who are nothing more than walking, talking clichés, and in an effort to save the fleeting bit of tension that's actually there, Armored utilizes an almost unending score that plays aggressively over the film and does manage to add some drama and anxiety to a few scenes that are otherwise hindered by almost laughable predictability.

Armored Blu-ray Movie, Video Quality 

Armored secures a fantastic 1080p, 2.40:1-framed transfer for its Blu-ray debut. This lean-and-mean transfer has all the visual bases covered, exhibiting an image that's a hair on the dark side but seemingly intentionally so. It follows, then, that blacks are of paramount importance to the transfer, and while a few shots seem to be devoured in overwhelming darkness, they are generally spot-on and pure throughout. Fine detail is immaculately rendered across the board; viewers will note every pore, facial hair, and line on faces, while all the expected nuances to be found on the armored guard uniforms -- patches, embroidery, velcro, and zippers -- all appear with a handsome, lifelike texture. Finer detailing -- from the heavy dust atop an in-car radio to the dirt floor of a factory that plays a prominent role in the film -- is also handled without a hitch by this Blu-ray transfer. Background imagery also remains sharp and focused, with even the most minute objects within the aforementioned factory, for instance, taking on a clear and refined appearance. On the flip side, Armored isn't a particularly vibrant film; much of the action takes place at night, in poorly-lit interiors, or inside a dark and abandoned factory setting. The film additionally employs a color scheme that's fairly devoid of life; the armored trucks and the employee uniforms -- some of the most prominent objects in the film -- are constructed with shades of gray, silver, blue, and black, but the transfer handles the picture's bleak tone with ease. Flesh tones are also natural in appearance, and a fine layer of film grains caps off what is just another in a growing line of exceptional Blu-ray transfers from Sony.

Armored Blu-ray Movie, Audio Quality 

Armored rolls onto Blu-ray with a high-octane DTS-HD MA 5.1 lossless soundtrack that's sure to keep viewers awake even when the film's lackluster content can't. Armored is a music-heavy film, and the DTS track cranks out every beat with pinpoint precision and also pounds out every last ounce of low-end goodness with a booming authority that puts plenty of other soundtracks to shame. Bass also plays a crucial factor in creating the atmosphere of the armored truck; the powerful motor sends plenty of hard-hitting rumbles through the listening area and does an exceptional job of placing the listener either inside or about the exterior of the vehicle -- both while idling and in motion -- as the situation warrants. There's enough tight, clean bass in here to break in any new subwoofer and to give those toned veterans a run for their money. Additionally, Armored's soundtrack boasts a full and satisfying surround presentation; directional effects and distinct environmental ambience are implemented seamlessly throughout, even if much of the film is loud and rambunctious. Still, there are plenty of quieter dialogue-driven scenes, but whether it's whisper-quiet drama or screaming and shouting during some of the film's more intense action pieces, this DTS track delivers every syllable with ease. No doubt about it, Armored secures a hefty and vigorous lossless soundtrack that gets the better of the movie it accompanies at every turn.

Armored Blu-ray Movie, Special Features and Extras 

Armored delivers a few bonus materials for this Blu-ray release. First up is an audio commentary track with Producer Dan Farah and Actors Skeet Ulrich and Milo Ventimiglia. Discussions include the real-life profession of armored car duty, various anecdotes surrounding the making of the film, changes in the script through the filmmaking process, technical lingo used during the film, and more. The track is rather dry and of limited technical relevance, focusing instead on more secondary and tertiary information that's of only little import to the film itself. Planning the Heist: Making Of (1080i, 15:19) is a decent piece that offers a general overview of Armored, examining at the origins of the project, the assemblage of the cast and crew, the look and feel of the movie, the performances of the actors, and more. Next is Armed and Underground: Production Design (1080i, 6:47), a detailed look at Armored's set design and shooting locations and how they add to the atmosphere of the movie. Crash Course: Stunts (1080i, 11:30) offers viewers a glimpse into the world of crafting some of the film's more involved stunts and action pieces and the level of involvement of the primary actors in working around them. Also included BD-Live functionality; Sony's MovieIQ connectivity; and 1080p trailers for 2012, The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, Bounty Hunters, Takers, It Might Get Loud, Soul Power, Extraordinary Measures, "Breaking Bad," The Da Vinci Code, and Casino Royale. Disc one of this set also features a PSP digital copy of Armored. Unfortunately, it was unavailable for download at the time of publication. Disc two houses a second digital copy of Armored for iTunes. Sampled on a second-generation iPod Touch, the video quality demonstrates the expected bouts of banding and blocking, but color reproduction and detail are fairly rendered. The audio presentation rarely feels cramped; dialogue reproduction is solid if occasionally muffled, music and effects enjoy decent clarity, and there's a fair sense of space to the admittedly limited presentation.

Armored Blu-ray Movie, Overall Score and Recommendation 

Armored is sort of like those phony tanks and airplanes and artillery batteries that the allies crafted out of plywood and other flimsy materials to fool the Nazis into believing that an invasion was to commence somewhere other than Normandy before D-day. This movie is convincing enough to pass a cursory inspection from a distance, but look any closer, and there's absolutely nothing of substance to be concerned with. Armored isn't a bad movie. It's not a good movie, either. In fact, it's not fair to toss it into the alarmingly large herd of midrange movies, either. No, Armored is something special, a movie that captures the absolute mid-ground so well that it could very well serve as the film school definition of "average." Decent direction, a fair pace, competent acting, a passable story, and an adrenaline-pumping score that serves as the masking agent for the movie's surprising lack of urgency, drama, and relevancy are all key elements in achieving this remarkable feat. Armored is worth a watch; it won't too terribly upset cinephiles and it should entertain on a base level less demanding viewers, but neither group will find much worth remembering once the credits begin to roll. As for its Blu-ray release, Sony has delivered yet another disc with an exceptionally strong technical presentation and a decent assortment of extras. Armored -- in all its mediocre glory -- is worth checking out as a rental.